if i ruled the world it would be glorious sunshine,however i do know that into our lives a little rain must fall,so if we wanted rain,it would come but only in our garden/wherever we wanted/needed it.
whatever we planted grew,and to the required size[thus avoiding dissapointment/tears of a 5yr old.]
we would already know the things we needed/wanted to know and not have to learn the ‘other’stuff,thus cutting out the boring and useless,not to mention the years at school doing applied maths/irish/physics/chem/macbeth etc-cross out/add those that apply!
Dogs wouldn’t bite,cats wouldn’t scratch etc,thus avoiding pain and tears of a 5 yr old,siblings,mother and friends.
If you had the urge to fight/start a war etc,there would be a designated area far,far away to do it,but you would have to get there by yourself,do it naked[that would probably stop the urge,as most men feel vunerable and look silly in the buff!] and not be allowed back until the fight was done/out of your system.
women could shop/drink/eat without men whining,but men could only watch sport/belch/fart/become ill/take a day off etc with written permission from the women after 1 weeks notice[we MAY have plans..]
Children would be seen and not heard,other than when doing the dishes/sweeping chimneys/cutting the lawn.
There would be no need for divorce as long as the men toed the line,however if need be it would be swift/sharp and painful{a lesson learned…]
There would be no tum/bum/chin tucks,no upsizing/aligning/suction/reductions-we are all perfect as we are,but if the men needed them then go ahead but remember the 1 weeks notice and no whining rule.
Those we adored,would adore us back-no unrequited love here!
But men would be men-no wimps need apply
To validate their ‘manness’they would give birth,no pain relief and back at work next day.We girls however would share the warm,fuzzy-wuzzy feelings and the required bed rest.
Birds would sing[after 6am]fly freely and in return for not ‘bombing’us/our cars/anything,cats would be vegetarian.
Ovens would not burn food or limbs,pies would be perfect not soggy and self cleaning really would mean SELF CLEANING and not cleaned by self.
words such as how much!/no/maybe/umm/hmmm et al would be banned.
Overtime would be readily available to anyone that wanted it/whenever it was wished for and if you didn’t wish to do it,it wouldn’t be a problem-unless you wished it!
glasses would only be needed to drink out of,teeth/hair would be permanent in fact the only thing that wouldn’t be is markers/grass stains{depends how you got them..}add your own..
socks/limbs/eyes/gloves etc would be like swans
When blogging and making long and useless lists,dinner/husband/children etc would gladly be put on hold or as in a steffi world,the oven/freezer/plates etc would team up and serve you when you had finished or maybe [just once please!!]husband/children even the dog would do it![and gladly]
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